Cochamó Valley


August 5, 2009

Four weeks of vacation now! Score. Well, I still only get three weeks paid, but they let me take an additional week off unpaid, so I’m using that to go see Grandma and Caspar for Christmas and I can take three weeks here.

By the way, could you surface at some point, please? I think Cas and Grandma would like to get married, and they’re waiting for you to be a part of our lives again in more ways than cryptic phone calls, letters, and postcards.

Just a suggestion. Going to read now.

August 11, 2009

I can’t even…you have had such an amazing life, Gio. And now that I’m more used to your writing style in Latin, your journals are really hilarious at times.

And then sometimes they make me cry.

Don’t worry, I’m taking good care of them.

August 14, 2009

I think Mano is starting to think about marriage and babies, and all that stuff. I’m only twenty-eight, but he’s older than me, he’s already thirty-two. (And yes, I’m sure you’re probably laughing when you read that, old man.)

I just don’t know. He wanted to move in together last winter, but I like having my space. When he’s there too much…well, we just get on each other’s nerves, you know? I like having my alone time. We had a huge fight about it, but we worked through it. He’s a good guy, and I love him a lot.

August 19, 2009

I’m so fucking mad right now, I can hardly write.

Was that you in the trees last night? It better not have been! I cannot believe you would come that close and not even—

Nevermind, I can believe it.

It was you. I could even smell the smoke. I can’t believe you would do that to me.

Yes, I can.

Damn it, Gio. Damn it! Damn you. Damn this valley. Damn this house. Damn your journals. Damn everything.

I’m not doing it anymore. I refuse. What do you want from me? What? Just call me or write me or do anything! But I’m not doing this anymore. I’m done.

You know what? Don’t write me. Don’t contact me. I never want to see you again, or hear from you, or anything. I’m moving on with my life. I have a life! Do you realize that? And you’re not in it, so leave me alone.

I’m not coming back here. I’m through.

You asshole! I’ve had enough of pale faces haunting me. I’ve done it before and I’m not going to let you get to me the way my father did. I’m leaving tomorrow, and I’m not coming back.

Do you understand me?

And when Mano asks me to marry him, I’m saying yes.

2 thoughts on “2009

  1. kathy79 says:

    That was a very intense journal post, definitely leaves me wanting more. I am very thankful I only have two weeks left to find out what happens next. Happy Thanksgiving! Kathy

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